Marathon vs Sprint?

I have had no less than 10 people ask me whose labor I preferred: Ben's or Hadassah's? While I hate to use overutilized running analogies, the 2 births can really only be compared to a sprint (Ben) vs a marathon (Hadassah). Same activity, roughly the same end result, but 2 very different methods of arriving! It's still hard to compare the 2, really, because some things were just intrinsically different with Hadassah because I had birthed before so I kind of knew what was going on (the hardest thing with Ben's birth was not knowing what was going on for much of it because it was outside of anything I had prepared myself for or read about). Still, for those of you who are morbidly curious, here goes!
How long was I in labor with each? With Ben, I was checked just as I started to feel contractions and was 1 cm dilated, 50% effaced, with baby at -1 station. 20 minutes later, I was complete and ready to push. 25 minutes after that, he flew into entered the world (yeah. 45 minutes. Told you it was a sprint.). With Hadassah, the question of how long I was in labor is a little harder to determine. If you count from when I started having contractions 3-5 minutes apart, 24 hours a day, it was 21 days. If you count from when things started to noticably pick up/become more intense, it was 32 hours. If you count (as I usually do) from the time of the first documented cervical change, it was 17 hours (I usually count from this one because that's when the "marathon" of standing, walking, squatting, swaying, bouncing, etc. began) with 15 minutes of pushing.
Both labors started on their own, neither were augmented with drugs in any way, I did not use pain medication/epidurals, etc. for either one, I spent my entire labor in the hospital with both, and both resulted in a healthy baby and a happy Mommy.
That said, I will take the marathon over the sprint any day.
The benefit of going quickly is that...well, it is over quickly. That's about it. Going from not being in labor straight into transition is really not fun, especially with your first birth-meaning you have no clue what is going on and just think you are being a giant wimp. The last 30-45 minutes of Hadassah's birth were very similar to Ben's birth in terms of how intense contractions felt (and how loud I was during them!) BUT I had hours of buildup beforehand AND even during the most intense part I had breaks between contractions (with Ben, once they started they just came on top of each other until I started pushing). I will say that I did not enjoy being stuck in transition for 4 hours with her, but I was able to manage it up until a few minutes before the decision was made to go ahead and rupture the sac and get her to come out.
Going slower is most definitely easier on Mama's body. With Ben, after I birthed him and the placenta, there was still over an hour of stitching to do (and a surgery 5 months after that). With Hadassah, I didn't need even 1 stitch. Can I tell you how deeply relieved I was when my doctor announced that no repair needed to be done?? I think my doula and I both cried. Yes, I am still a bit sore from her birth, but nothing like how I was with Ben, and this soreness responds to rest. After the quick birth, I just felt like I had JUST given birth for...well, until I recovered from the surgery.
A longer birthing process does mean less energy is left when you get to the pushing phase. I had planned to deliver Hadassah on all fours, like I did with Ben, but by the time I actually got there, I couldn't hold myself upright anymore and ended up finishing labor on my side and then on my back (which was a position I was actively planning to avoid-but it was what worked at the moment so you just go with it!). And I think I am still recovering (physically) from the effects of labor. I am thankful that I am in a job where I use most of my muscles a lot all day every day-that really helped prepare me for holding various positions for hours at a time (my nurse couldn't believe my arms were holding out as long as they were).
The longer process with Hadassah was very redeeming in the sense that I felt stronger through it. With the quick birth process, I felt like I had completely overestimated myself and was just being a big wimp because I was literally swept up into it and holding on for dear life (and quite literally climbing walls, screaming, etc.). With a longer birth, because I had time to build up to it and really didn't start getting to that point until I had been stuck at 9 cm and 90% effaced for over 3 hours. I still felt in control of myself (and my volume!) up until that point. The nurses and doctors were all very affirming as well in terms of how well I was handling it (well, except for the anesthesiologist who came to put in my IV-I didn't like him! First he threatened me with a central line, then he kind of laughed at my plan of giving birth unmedicated) which was nice. I still feel bad about the noise I was making at the end, but we're going to hope that most mamas get to that point eventually and they are used to it...if you know differently, don't tell me! Haha! Pushing her out was much more painful than pushing Ben out. I think some of that was because I was pushing through scar tissue (and purposely pushing in shorter bursts to try to minimize damage) and some of it was because of my frame of reference-with Ben, the pushing phase was actually when I got some time to breathe between contractions where I hadn't been able to before!
At the end of the day, both labors were completely worth it because the end result was my beautiful babies. I would gladly go through either again for them. If I have a choice, maybe we can go for a happy medium next time?

First holding Ben

First glimpses of Hadassah-they had SUCH better post birth policies in place at the hospital when she was born!